Identity

How much of my identity is bound up in my running? Obviously, for those of us who keep a blog of our running/training exploits, the answer is probably quite a bit. I ask this question because of a recent, ongoing experience I had with a close friend.

I trained for two marathons and two half marathons with a partner. We ran all of our long runs together and encouraged each other through the weekly "just getting in the mileage" runs. For a while, we even did all of our gym workouts together, then I changed my membership to another gym, but she still came to workout with me on occasion. During all of this time running, she complained of knee issues (preexisting). She had a series of cortisone shots and then, last fall, she had the knee scoped and was told her days of long runs were over. Sure, she could probably run another marathon as long as she scheduled the knee replacement surgery for right after. You get the picture.

Before this fall, I had never trained alone, but it has become a challenge that I am embracing. I get nervous for the long runs, sure, but I head out the door and do them. My knees, fortunately, are fine. I am continuing to train and I am setting goals and meeting them. I hired a trainer and took his advice regarding nutrition. I have lost weight.

Recently, I learned from a mutual friend that my running partner friend was annoyed whenever I mentioned running. So, I tried to steer clear of the subject when I spoke to her. Then, a couple of weeks ago, she called my cell phone while I was shopping at the mall. She was also at the mall. "What are you shopping for?" she asked. "I need to get something to wear tonight... since I lost weight nothing fits anymore." Then, in the frostiest voice you can imagine she replied, "Again you are mentioning your weight loss." I said goodbye, hung up, and bought two new outfits.

I figured if I could no longer talk about an activity that is so much of my life, then what could I talk about?

Yesterday, we had lunch. She appologized and explained that running had been so much a part of her life that it hurt her to hear anything about my running. She said that running had been her identity. And on top of that, without the running, she was putting on weight and couldn't bear to hear that I was taking it off.

So, I am curious. The question has been posed before, in a runner's forum that I frequent "if you could not run, what would you do," but it is posed in a vacuum. I actually have another blog -- my running blog. This is my general blog where I can talk about things besides running. But guess what most of the entries are about? Yes, running.